A Year in Black and White

Freshman year: braces, ugly clothes, and constant confusion. Everyone had different experiences, but we can all agree it was the worst. For most kids, it’s a year of experimentation and finding yourself. For me, it was full of terrible friends and even worse grades. With the pressure of transitioning into high school came the need of approval from others, so I looked high and low for someone to give me that validation. Then one day, I started sitting with my middle school friends and we all clicked together like old times. It was like I had the friends I was searching for, and with that came my first best friend. I was finally getting invited to a lot more social events, and I found myself away from home a lot more. /Here they are/, I thought,/ I finally found my perfect high school friends/. At least, that’s what I thought.

Unfortunately, what I saw on social media wasn’t what their life was actually like. I slowly realized that they only pretended to be best friends. The routine we had built dependent on the same place and time every weekend had started to get boring. What started as friends eating lunch together turned into gossip sessions about each other when they turned their back. Eventually, the time came where our friendships ended. Although I pretended not to notice, I couldn’t help but feel the judgment of others when I walked through the halls. It was like I’d come out of a delirious state. Suddenly, I realized that I had isolated myself with these people for so long that I lost all of my real friends. Not only that, but I had paid so much attention to my social life that I was failing two classes.

After investing all of my time into school and my grades, I ended up passing some of my classes, but not all of them. Those are the consequences I had to face for putting friends before school. Although it has taken me some time to find my new friends—and I’m not so sure I have a best friend— I’ve realized friends don’t just show up on your doorstep. You have to prove your own trust and respect to get the same in return. I joined journalism which truly has made me a better person. I’ve opened up a lot more, and I am starting to take on more things to finally be proud of. The importance of finding your “thing” in high school is real. Whatever you’re interested in you should stick with it. Craze is the best thing I’ve gotten out of high school so far. Once I walked into the Journalism room and instantly felt the positive energy radiating from the environment, I learned that I don’t need the constant approval from others. The first step to finding your friends is first being fully comfortable with yourself, so as long as I’m happy, it’s all good.